Can't keep my hands out the cookie jar!

I've been wanting to write about my fear of monogamy for many days now. But I feel as if I put way to much negative emphasis on relationships as it is. I also don't want my blog to become just rants and raves about my not so poetic love life. But for some reason, it seems to be the thing that stares at me in the face begging me to ask questions about it. I think monogamy is against human nature, not saying I don't practice monogamy, but by basic instincts it is REALLY hard to monogamous. I don't know if it's just me, or if its the fact that I have this constant buzzing noise in my head telling me to "hurt him before he can hurt you" bullshit going on. Orrr if its the fact that I genuinely have way to BIG of a HEART to just love one person. Am I wrong to think that if I have to put EFFORT into being with just one person, and it anyways in turn isn't making me happy, that I shouldn't do it? Will I end up dying lonely and bitter? I don't know. BUT I will find out.